Some ways of thinking are better than others. And certain ways of thinking can prolong the healing process and make it harder to move on. These are called cognitive distortions, and by recognizing and challenging them, you can begin to get over your breakup faster. Here are seven cognitive distortions to consider when you need to get over a breakup faster.
All-or-nothing thinking: This is when you view the breakup as either a complete failure or a perfect relationship. Try to focus on the good and bad parts of the relationship, and recognize that it was not all good or all bad.
Overgeneralization: This is when you use one negative event to make sweeping conclusions about yourself, the relationship, or your future. Remember that one breakup does not define your entire life or your ability to have a healthy relationship.
Mental filtering: This is when you focus only on the negative aspects of the relationship and ignore the positive ones. Challenge yourself to see both the good and bad parts of the relationship.
Jumping to conclusions: This is when you assume things without evidence or proof. Don't assume that your ex is happier without you or that you will never find love again.
Emotional reasoning: This is when you let your emotions dictate your thoughts and actions. Try to acknowledge your feelings but also think logically and rationally.
Personalization: This is when you blame yourself for the breakup and believe that you are the cause of everything that went wrong. Recognize that relationships involve two people, and it's not always one person's fault.
Catastrophizing: This is when you imagine the worst-case scenarios and dwell on them. Try to focus on the present and take things one day at a time, instead of worrying about what could happen in the future.
By challenging these cognitive distortions and adopting a more balanced and realistic perspective, you can begin to heal and move on from your breakup faster.
Additionally, It can be helpful to talk to a friend or family member about your feelings or seeking the help of a therapist for breakups. If you're feeling anxiety there is also online anxiety therapy from licensed counsellors which can help with triggering emotions and reactions you might still have about your ex. There are applications that have meditations and audios to help you sleep, relax, get over stuff. One to consider is the headspace app because their free trial lets you checkout their goods and experience what works best for you.